Sqare peg in a round hole or limited beliefs?
July 14, 2014 at 1:16 pm #72590Richard VernettiKeymaster
Coaches, how do you know if you are trying to fit a square peg into a round hole vs. trying to overcome limited thinking and beliefs? For years I have wanted to develop a network marketing business but have never had much success. I have only myself to blame as I have never given it my best effort due to numerous fears, excuses and limiting beliefs. I joined Sealfit hoping I could overcome these obstacles but am now wondering if I am just trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. Any thoughts on the subject would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.January 14, 2015 at 7:56 pm #76041Richard VernettiKeymaster
It is very likely people will disagree with me here, and even consider this response completely unrelated to the question at hand. But think about it. The square peg, round hole dilemma IS the limited belief. If we orient ourselves only around fears, we will only believe that aspect of the situation, and thus, only ever see and expect that path (the hole is always too small or the peg is always the wrong shape). Instead, by acknowledging it, embracing it, and pressing through it, the belief will transform us (reshape the peg, resize the hole), or we will learn to replace it with a more practical one. It feels safe on this side of the hole, but there’s a lot more to see on the other side.
What if the square peg is smaller than the round hole?
In no way am I trying to poke fun here, instead, try to think of fear as making the peg larger than it really is.
The peg is a package: a business plan, goals, ambitions, and ideas waiting to be executed.
The hole is execution: hurl the peg through in a rush and expect it to fall through on the other side. The business fails, it sucks, the end.
The hole is execution: inflate the peg with fears and anxiety, expecting it will never fit through the hole. The business never starts, get upset, and have no reason to be.
The hole is execution: break the peg down into parts and try to jam all of them through at once, getting upset that they do not fit at the same time. The business begins, but so hurriedly that nothing seems to make sense, and all potential partners dropout.
The hole is execution: break the peg down into parts and feed them through as each opportunity arises. The business starts (or is conducted) in small, manageable and thoughtful steps.
The hole is execution: the entirety of the peg has made it through.
The business has successfully begun and we can happily repeat the last two steps every day. Others begin to follow our lead, and the business blooms!
What if the square peg IS larger than the round hole?
In this case, fear has shrunk the hole, leaving no room for the peg to get through.
The peg is YOU: goals, happiness, a business plan, a path.
The hole is execution: sit atop the hole, realizing the peg is too large, upset that fear will never let you through.
The hole is execution: force ourselves through the hole, and chip away the best parts of ourself and the potential business, getting through, but coming up disappointed on the other side.
The hole is execution: deflate fears by acknowledging them, not giving into the energy they wish to steal, widening the hole until the peg can pass through gracefully.
Everything is as it should be. We aware that there are risks to beginning the business, but they do not prevent us from building or conducting it. We can then thoughtfully address each fear as it arises, and keep the peg and the hole operating smoothly.
What if the peg was never square at all?
In this case, fear has reshaped the peg into something it is not.
The peg has been long and cylindrical, but fear has compressed it into a smaller, fatter, now square peg.
The peg is YOU: our goals, our happiness, our plan, our path.
The hole is execution: we see the path through, but fear keeps the peg in a square shape.
The hole is execution: we step up to the hole, breathe deeply, accept, and release our fears, returning to our original shape, and passing through the hole gracefully.
The last option is clearly the best, right? Fear no longer occupies the space around us, and we are free to be who we are, operating the business as we see fit. Better yet, fears are no longer occupying the space necessary to observe execution. We can see, and share with others how this experience has allowed us to start and conduct a thriving business.
As to the statement of limiting beliefs:
The only limiting belief is the one we haven’t tested.
Any other can be reshaped through acknowledgement and experience. Accepting the belief as it stands today will give way to the courage to test it, or reshape it when a teachable moment comes our way.
Start today, even with something small. Continue tomorrow, even if there’s only a glimmer of what the business can look like. When new opportunities arise, begin to seize them, and discover teachable moments in the process. Apply the OODA (Observe, Orient, Decide, Act) loop as new obstacles arise. The process will get easier with practice, and hopefully stressful situations become fun. What’s stopping us today? Will it stop us tomorrow?
(i had replied to this topic before, but it looks as if the site’s database had been restored today. not sure if the comment was intentionally removed so it is reposted).
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